Prosocial Fixes to Parasocial Fiascos
In 2022, celebrity culture has taught us that if no substance can be offered, it may be better to remain quiet and leave something to the imagination rather than forcibly remove the veil and stun everyone with how stunted in growth, how unable to manage rage or basic personal schedules, how preoccupied by the perception of victimhood — despite objective privileges beyond belief — , how hopelessly addicted, bitter, charmless, absurd, disgraced, dangerous to the community, dangerous to their partner many of the most celebrated and popular personalities are.
The magic of a writer, and of some art forms, is that the deeper you know and understand them, the more appealing they become. A highly skilled writer tickles your sense of security, your love of life and your gratitude.
That is lost on people who have earned or inherited so much money or fame that they no longer have to care about how they influence people, even those whose approval they crave. It is not exactly fun to witness that, or a positive use of celebrity status… But at least it reveals that there is no leadership coming from people who are full of vices and whose inner development hasn’t occurred yet. Maybe that is the dark side of being admired for superficial reasons: the rewards confirm that one is doing very well, while signals that one needs to improve and develop are missing.
We need to value our balance, our unfolding healing and our future more than fawn over train wrecks who never check in with themselves. Yes, they are good-looking and rich, they have access to resources, to the most recent research, to dedicated experts and to circles of influence; but they chose ego over evolution, unconcern over decency. Choices are meaningful: they distinguish one person from another, one person from all other people.
There are plenty of hungry ghosts, bad boys and shams in your own town. You figured out a way to not be so impressed with them. Now you can figure out a way to not boost bigger sharks with your attention and your adoration.
Adore those who have been pouring into you, who are worthy of respect, who help you in your daily life, who reinforce that the grass is greener where you water it, who benefit from your love and whose presence instils peace… Discover the good ones in your life once again. Let your joy that you had the good fortune to meet them bubble up. Make their day.
4 August 2022
